Are you writing a romance novel and afraid that your story might offend someone? Well here's something you need to know.
The romance genre, in my opinion, is the number one genre that is quickest to offend. Why? Because everyone views romance through different rose colored glasses. What one person thinks is romantic, another person could find disgusting. So how do we write a romance without offending someone? It’s simple – you don’t.
This might not be what you want to hear, but it’s the truth and it honestly applies to any avenue of writing. No matter what you write, you will offend someone somewhere. There is nothing you can do about it and if you want to be a writer you are going to have to get over this fear.
Let’s look at my writing for example. My romance stories feature shifters. That alone could repulse millions. Does that stop me? No. My romance stories also feature a lot of violence and war. Is that romantic? No! Do I still write it? Yup. Why? Because I want to. It’s that simple. What makes me happy? Writing about shifters in war who fall in love. To me, that’s romantic. So I write it. You need to remember that you are writing for yourself first. Not for others. If you write for others first, you will never finish what you write because there is no way you will please everyone and thus your writing will never please yourself.
Now, I say this very carefully, because there is a difference between writing with good intention and writing something you know in your heart-of-hearts is wrong. If you genuinely feel that your writing is romantic and does no harm to any individual with intention. Then write. But if you are writing and your scene is dicey and you aren’t sure if it is offensive for the sake of being offensive and does not further the plot in any significant way…delete it. It’s better to be safe than sorry.
Example: A lot of shifter romances have rape scenes; The whole trope of the “beast taking over” thing. I would NEVER write a rape scene between the characters that are intended to be in love with one another. Sure it might be used to amplify a bad person doing bad things, but the love interest will NEVER harm or disrespect the MC because I know in my heart-of-hearts that is not right, so I don’t write it. Yet, no matter how clean of a romance I write, my writing will still offend people because it’s not how they might view romance. But, at the end of the day, I know I wrote something that I am completely proud of and I know it was written with good intentions. That’s what you need to realize. If you are worried about offending a specific race, religion, sexuality, or what have you…ask them. Get on social media and ask that group of people about the scene. They will be honest with you and tell you the truth. If you are writing a scene that portrays a gay couple and you yourself aren’t gay and don’t know the proper terminology for something, ask. If you are writing a scene about a different race but don’t want to accidentally stereotype or describe something wrong, ask. No one will ever fault you for seeking knowledge and bettering yourself. It’s better to ask when you don’t know instead of assume and be labeled a monster when it comes out wrong. So can you write something without offending someone? No. But as long as you write with genuine goodwill and you ask when you aren’t sure, then you will be fine. Write for yourself first and be proud of your work. That’s all you can do at the end of the day because there is no way you will ever be able to please every single reader.