Romance and erotica are not the same genre. It's about time you learn the difference.
How many times have you told someone that you write romance stories and they automatically assume you write erotica? This is the terrible stigma that plagues the romance genre and all who write it. People who don’t know any better assume that romance writers write erotica and they couldn’t be farther from the truth (and it honestly says a lot about how they view romance too – eek!). While there are different heat levels of the romance genre, some of which do include sex scenes, the major difference between romance and erotica is the basic difference between lust and love. Romance novels focus on love. Erotica focuses on lust. It is possible to love someone and never have sex. It is possible to have sex with someone and never love them. Every square is a rectangle. But rectangles are not squares. Romance novels can feature sex in them. But erotica’s core focus is the sex. If you have read my previous posts you have heard me say this before: Romance novels must be romance forward. Meaning that the romance, or love, between two characters is what drives the story forward. In erotica it’s the sex that drives the story forward. If it’s still too complicated to understand try this exercise: Take out every sex scene in your book. Do you still have a book with a great plot and characters who are in love with a happily ever after? Then you have a romance book. Did your book completely lose all it’s content and the plot isn’t too stable without all those sex scenes? Then it’s erotica.
So no, the romance genre and erotica genre are not one in the same. While they can appear similar at first glance, romance novels are more about the warm and fuzzies instead of the warm and fuzzies, if you know what I mean.